I had never recognized how much fear was at the center of my life until I started my personal downhill slide into despair. I loved a man dearly. In the beginning, he was wonderful to me, and my two sons. As our relationship progressed and warning signs appeared, I would wonder what I could be doing better, how my sons must be misbehaving. If only my sons and I would try harder, things would get better. Sometimes it did and sometimes not.
Then came the wedding day.
It was filled with doubt, buoyed by hope.
As he turned to recovery and Alcoholics Anonymous*, I was introduced to the twelve-step programs of Al-Anon* and Codependent's Anonymous*. I would willingly accompany him to an AA meeting when invited. Slowly I was beginning to face my fears. I began to explore my family of origin issues and realized how paralyzing my fears had become. And, at the heart of it all, I desperately wanted to love and be loved. Slowly, safely progress was being made. I was gaining strength and courage to shed the past and build a new future. I felt hope. And then there was none.
From deep within came the courage to say "no more". No more fear. No more abuse. Consistent, weekly attendance at Al-Anon and Codependent's Anonymous meetings gave me the strength. And I was not alone. My support groups listened. My God, my Higher Power, provided comfort and love. Self-esteem, self-confidence and self-love grew.
Twelve-step programs provide safety, courage, strength and hope to all who seek it. Codependency is my addiction. Alcoholics Anonymous, Al-Anon and Codependent's Anonymous helped me walk down a new path to healing and recovery. I urge you to seek them and/or other twelve-step programs out. Look in your local phone book, on the Internet, and/or ask a counselor or friend.
I combined the twelve-step resources, with a caring, safe therapist and the following tools as I traveled down my "Path to Peace".
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